Archive for the 'Awaken' Category

17
Sep
10

Time to brag on God… my personal wake up call.

“But as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds.” Psalm 73:28

Ok, time to brag on God a bit here. Seriously, God is AWESOME!!!! Have you ever just sat back and thought about all the stuff God is doing in and around you and felt like your head was going to explode because it wouldn’t all fit in there? Welcome to my last few months. In the last month and a half God has especially shown just how glorious He can be. I’ve attempted countless times to put it into words, and in every instance I fall short. It’s a new sense of purpose. A new urgency, and it’s exciting!

To give you the full picture I’ve actually got to go back to July, the 25th to be exact. I was sitting on the floor of Sugar Creek Baptist church, crying, miserable, confused, and angry. I was talking to God in a room where the Holy Spirit was in every crevasse, people were being saved, and kids were on their faces. The topic of our conversation in a nutshell: “God, what is wrong with me?” I told God I didn’t understand my lack of urgency. I didn’t understand how a few weeks before I could be in Ethiopia, on fire, in the word, sensitive to the Spirit, caring about people dying and going to hell and now I was in America, and I didn’t care. I wanted to care. I wanted to have the same passion, to love, to minister. But I didn’t know how, I didn’t feel it. All I knew how to do in America was want-to-want God and long for Ethiopia. So I got on my face. I wept. I talked honestly with him. I asked Him to fix me, and He answered. He told me I didn’t have to feel it. I had to do one thing that would lead to the rest happening… surrender. One easy word… so incredibly hard to actually do. The process began. Incredibly slow at times, insanely accelerated at others.

Fast forward to today and I am overwhelmed what God has brought me into and through and is preparing to do. In the last few months he has brought me incredible new, strong friendships, based solely on Christ and making him known to the world. He has strengthened old friendships the same way. He has brought intense accountability that is so hard, but so rewarding and freeing. He has brought a fresh passion and experience of His Holy Spirit, the almost lost person of the trinity in my life. He has brought random strangers in the midst of their suffering, and allowed me the chance to tell about a God who loves them. Just in the last few days he has brought a prayed for and long desired mentor for even more intense learning and accountability. And one of the most overwhelming things He has brought is a boldness to speak truth, actually to speak at all. He is giving me a voice and I’m attempting to practice using it, seeking his wisdom in every word. He is giving us a vision of a new Pentecost. A time that we can say the message God speaks through us is cutting to the heart and new believers are being added daily to our numbers. (Acts 2:37-47)

The challenge for us as believers is this: It’s time to WAKE UP! God had to wake me up in a crazy in your face way. It’s time to be more passionate, humble, sold-out, bold, real, and on our faces than ever before. God is working, and trust me you don’t want to miss out on this. It’s exciting! It makes you feel like singing, dancing, staying up all night praying, fasting, shouting, weeping, praising God, and falling on your face all at the same time, and it’s the best feeling in the world. Get on board. You’ll never be the same and you’ll never regret it. Praying for you all, that God would wreck your world the way he has been wrecking mine lately. Love you.

24
Sep
08

time for a little change?

Hurricane, hurricane, hurricane…. There I got that out of the way. Yes, I am about to blog about the hurricane, original I know. It feels like these last few weeks have been months and I know that the affects of the hurricane are far from over for a lot of people. It’s strange, between school starting again and basically life starting again it feels like in some ways it is over but I don’t really want to move on. There are still reminders everywhere, still people hurting everywhere and I am struggling to find where my mind should be in all of this. Part of me is saying, “Ok school is back in session, time to focus here.” And the other part of me is saying, “Here is the time to stand up and really love people, to spend every moment you can helping meet those physical needs.” I’ve talked to several others who feel this same way.

 

I love what Russell was talking about Sunday with this being a time for us to find a new normal. Maybe that is what I’m really longing for. A new normal. A normal in which we are reaching out and actually helping those around us instead of just talking about it, a new normal where we tell those around us that we love them because we realize yet again that life is short, a new normal where we realize that possessions are not as important as people, a new normal where we stop looking at the TV and computer screens and actually spend real time with people in real conversations. Maybe life would be better if we did not rebuild those fences or turn our televisions back on. I don’t know I’m just thinking here. God, show me a new normal. Continue to make me question what I do and why. Make me uncomfortable for Your glory.

09
Sep
08

beautiful silence

So I must admit that lately I have been a bit distracted and if you have spent more than an hour with me lately you may have realized it or maybe not. The fact is there has been this weird haze lately. I’ve noticed it mostly when I am alone trying to be quiet either when studying for school, having my quiet times, or when trying to go to sleep. It’s like I have a thousand different thoughts in my mind and none of them will settle long enough for me to be able to think about any particular one for very long. This can be quite annoying when trying study or when trying to go to sleep. Knowing that all this has been going on I must be honest and say that in some ways I was not sure about sitting through a sermon on Sunday morning. Don’t get me wrong I love going and hearing new and old truths about God but in my mind I was afraid it would be like everything else lately. I was afraid that I would not be able to focus and I would just end up more distracted. When I walked into Awaken Sunday morning my whole attitude was different. I can’t really explain it. It was like I felt safe again, I felt level headed. When we took those few moments of silence it was beautiful and peaceful. It was what I think I’ve needed for a while now to sit and just be, to just take a few seconds and soak up the presence of God.

 

As I thought later about that experience it reminded me of Psalms 4: 8, “I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.” Every time I read this verse I get the image in my head of when I was a child and my parents would tuck me in bed and tell me to sleep well and not be afraid because they were there. It’s almost like God the Father is coming down and saying don’t be afraid child, don’t worry, I’m here and everything is going to be alright. I don’t know there is just something about that thought that brings such peace to my heart. I guess I should make more time to just be silent before God and rest in the fact that He is there and even when I don’t have it all together that’s alright because He does. Praise Him for that…




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